As the summer comes to a close, parents are taking time to plan the upcoming academic year. However, for divorced couples, this time of year often involves more than buying school supplies and deciding how to get the children back on a normal sleep schedule. Often, after a divorce, back-to-school season means reviewing parenting schedules and discussing responsibilities, from who is responsible for school drop-offs to which sports the kids will play.
While every family is different, in my more than two decades of experience—and as a family law attorney in Baltimore County—I have seen time and again how proper planning during the summer months can help reduce conflict throughout the school year and provide children with greater consistency as they transition back to school. Whether your parenting plan is relatively new or has been in place for years, August is a great time to review how school-related responsibilities will be handled.
Strong communication with the school is one of the most important aspects of successful co-parenting throughout the school year. Before classes begin, co-parents should determine how school information will be shared, which can greatly reduce future conflict and confusion. Co-parents should discuss:
In today’s age, most schools allow both parents to receive communications, which can create more consistency between households and prevent misunderstandings, even if one parent is largely in charge of school communication. Many of the families I work with in Maryland also use co-parenting apps to keep this kind of information organized and accessible to both households.
Back-to-school expenses can rack up quickly, from tuition and fees to clothing and supplies. Parents should plan for these expenses before they pop up, and should also discuss:
While some custody agreements will specifically address who is responsible for educational expenses, others may be less clear. Before the school year begins, taking the time to review your specific agreement can help reduce potential conflict. If your existing custody agreement was based on an informal understanding rather than something documented, it's worth having it reviewed.
When parents live in separate school districts within Baltimore County or elsewhere in Maryland, deciding which school the child will attend can become more complex. Factors such as commute time, academic curriculum, and sports teams can all play into which school is ultimately best for your child. However, it’s important to remember that the most critical factor is the school that provides the most stability for your child. For example, when going back to school after divorce, the opportunity to remain close and connected with peers, teammates, and faculty at a familiar school often provides a much stronger benefit to a child than transferring to another school with a stronger soccer program.
Co-parents should evaluate which school best supports their child while also maximizing their ability to be an active participant in everything from morning drop-off to field trips.
In situations where parents share legal custody, educational decisions must generally be made together. If an agreement on the best school for your child cannot be reached, the courts may be asked to decide on the right school, based on your child’s best interests. Maryland courts apply the same "best interest of the child" standard used in custody cases generally. For general guidance on school enrollment, please visit The Maryland Department of Education.
Children generally benefit from both parents playing an active role in their education. Just because you and your co-parent may be divorced does not mean that this has to end. Depending on your particular circumstances, both parents can remain involved by:
If this is your first school year post-divorce, remember that successfully co-parenting your children does not mean that you and your ex must agree on every school-related issue or even that you need to be close friends. However, it does require respectful and collaborative communication and ultimately a commitment to your child’s academic success.
As children grow and change, so do their needs. By extension, your role in your children’s lives changes, too. As your children reach their teenage years, a parenting plan that may have worked well a few years ago may no longer be as successful due to more demanding schedules. At that point, your children may have jobs, sports, or theater practice after school. They may also have increased homework and late study schedules as they prepare for SATs and college applications.
Taking the time to review the parenting schedule before each school year begins allows parents to determine whether adjustments are appropriate. If you sense that the basketball practice that runs until 9:30 pm on your exchange day could create issues, my advice is to discuss this proactively with your ex before conflict arises and try to be flexible in finding a solution. Small changes to transportation arrangements, exchange times, or weekday parenting schedules may better accommodate a child's academic and extracurricular commitments and prevent unnecessary conflict.
The start of a new school year is an opportunity for co-parents to revisit routines, clarify responsibilities, and plan for the months ahead. As you review, if you find questions arising about educational decisions, parenting schedules, or custody arrangements, understanding your legal rights and responsibilities can help you make informed decisions.
If school-related co-parenting issues become difficult to resolve, speaking with an experienced Baltimore County, Maryland family law attorney can help you better understand your options. If you have family law questions about the upcoming school year, contact my office at (410) 657-2515 or email info@CohenLegalTeam.com. My goal is always to help you navigate this process with clarity, confidence, and less stress.
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